Wrapping my Head Around Fears

I am scared to watch the new season of Suits. I am scared to wake up to the realization that I no longer enjoy my favorite show. I am scared that my coffee is going to be too sweet. I am scared that when I go to bed, I will not be able to sleep. I am scared that once I sleep, I will see a bad dream again. I am scared that I have left the door unlocked. I am scared that I haven’t turned the gas off. I am scared that if I eat, I am going to put on weight. I am scared that a truck will crash into the car. I am scared that my words are going to hurt someone. I am scared that I will not be able to write well. I am scared that you will quit reading. I am scared that I will lose a loved one. I am scared that I will drop my phone somewhere. I am scared that it will pop out of my pocket, my handbag or even the car window automatically. I am scared that the two people sitting next to me are going to argue and I will have to make them see sense. I am scared that one day my anger will take the best of me. I am scared that we will soon see a sequel to this post. I am scared that I will never forgive those who have hurt me. I am scared of happiness. I am scared that something will go wrong. I am scared that I will always be stuck here. I am scared that everybody will move on to better things but I will never see a new dawn. I am scared to be so scared. I am so young and so scared. I am scared that when I grow old, I will be twice as scared as I am now.